Nature cycles

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Don’t you just love the way nature cycles... that we have different seasons – and that it isn’t always summer, or always winter? I love the way my garden changes so that it looks different all the time. Different plants pop up at different times, trees have different leaf coverings – it’s just glorius.

Who would ever want to miss out on all the seasons? Yet it strikes me that we humans are so busy trying to stay only in the spring-time of our lives.

Ageing is considered to be the winter of our lives – it’s almost a dirty word – we want to stay ‘immergroen’ (which means ‘forever green’ – or in other words ‘forever young’). We think of ageing and the effects of gravity as the ‘winter of our lives.’

It really doesn’t have to be. You see, when it comes to gardens the different seasons are about physical manifestations, but when it comes to the seasons of our lives, well…

that’s an internal mental job.

Diet City was the Winter of my life

For example, when I look back now, what I see is that when I was stuck in Diet City (the mental jail of food and body obsession), in reality that was like being living through a really harsh winter. Now 2 decades later, with body bits giving in to gravity, I’m mentally in springtime. I love my life – I like my body – I even like the ‘laughter lines’ that are proliferating on my face.

I’m sprouting new leaves of creativity and passion all the time. The tree of my life is so much fuller and more vibrant than it was ever before. The winter of my life was when I noticed every little so-called ‘imperfection’ and wanted to do whatever to get rid of it.

And yes, I know there will be times when some of my leaves drop, or I enter another period of winter – that’s that’s just a time of preparation for the next glorius burst of springtime.

Watching flowers blossom

I also love watching some of the Mind over Fatter flowers in ‘my garden’ growing and blooming into more joy-filled bodies. Joan Smith is a Mind over Fatter group leader in Parow South Africa (for more info on our groups or becoming a group leader please e.mail and I recently received this (shortened) e.mail from one of her group members:

“I've been with Joan for just over a month and can honestly say that it was the best decision I have made in a long time. I bought the MOF book after having seen an article in the "O" magazine. …."Thank you Cari for writing an amazing book and setting up the groups, because you have changed my life for the better…

One of the ladies in the group has inspired me so much that I am going to do the "Spar" 5km ladies walk - not run!!!!... I sat up last night doing the growth work for the week -the letter to our bodies, and it was so emotional but I made a promise to my body and to myself to start giving it the love and respect it deserves because I am nothing without it.

WOW that was hectic! I have always been such a tom boy and I bought myself my first dress (other than my wedding dress), I haven't worn a dress in over 20 years and tonight I have to wear it to the group and I am so nervous!!”

Well done Joan –all the planting and planting you are doing in people’s lives is blooming!

Well this question from Tammy really got me thinking (thanks Tammy). It just struck me so forcibly that dieting is a very un-beautiful ritual:
• They are unfair because they set you up to fail.
• They are dishonest because they don’t tell you they cause the very problems they supposedly solve.
• They don’t respect your inner wisdom and they don’t teach you how to trust yourself.

When I went to answer Tammy, as the words tumbled out of my fingers, I was quite amazed to realize that what I had written was a poem about the paradoxes of dieting. You can click here to read it ~ and please feel free to share it with others you think might enjoy it or find it thought-provoking.

Pelt yourself with beautiful information

Our new website ditch diets, live light (which I aim to make the most trustworthy sites for food, eating, exercising for adults, teens and children) is experiencing exponential growth rates.

I think people must feel pelted by flowers when they read it!

Not only has the traffic growth amazed me – but the number of people taking our interactive quizzes, or signing up for our free joy-filled body tips has been phenomenal.

And beautiful compliments about the website have come pelting in. Yay!

Personally really been surprised at how many people are taking our night time eating disorder quiz our nighttime eating quizz It’s by far our most utilized quiz, I never dreamed so many people would take it.

Because there has been such a demand for our joy-filled body tips, I’m also just about to launch another free e.course called: “Take one beautiful minute for myself”. It’ll be available some time before the end of March. This will be a fabulous way to pelt yourself with beauty.

There’s lots going on at Mind over Fatter – check out Cari's diary Our workshops, or even doing the Mind over Fatter programme are fabulous ways to shower yourself with ‘petals.’

Let's pelt our children with flowers

I think the thing I most notice as I do workshops is how many anxious/desperate parents there are out there. At every single event I talk at, what stands out for me is how many questions parents ask which reflect their fears around their children’s apparently imperfect bodies.

And just when I was sitting thinking about how best to help all these desperate parents (by writing my next book –Keeping your child out of food jail… oh man you want to see the research, it’s fascinating) someone in our online group posted this:

“What are we teaching the children? "Forget about honesty, integrity, kindness, love for yourself and your neighbour. As long as you are a size 0 you are perfect!!!!!! "That’s why I think Mind over Fatter will only grow from strength to strength. It’s addressing the root causes of the problem.”

Click here to join Mindoverfatter
Click to join Mindoverfatter

This made me realize how incredibly blessed I feel to have had anorexia and 20 years of desperate dieting. If I hadn’t I wouldn’t feel so passionate about showering myself and others with beauty nor would I be the guardian to the ditch diets, live light ideals that are having such a powerful transforming on our world.

And above all, personally, I’d rather die beautifully from outrageous joy and self kindness, laughing too much, living too fully or simply dancing the tango too wildly – wouldn’t you?

With love, light and beautiful flowers Cari

P.S. I love feedback on my newsletter and website - that's how I make them better


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I got the link to your website from the SBI website forum and decided to take a peek. Excellent information here. I especially like the page about sleep and weight , as well as the info on international weight research . Keep up the good work. I love your bright, cheery logo :)
Catherine - New Hampshire,USA

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Mind over Fatter

I really love the idea of doing some 'head stuff' tweaking instead of dieting. This is a GREAT website, loaded with unusual information.
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I LOVE this website. It's really thought-provoking, it's given me ideas about dieting and weight loss that I would never have contemplated. It makes such sense in a world where much about dieting doesn't. Bravo! I also loved your quizzes. I will be a repeat visitor. PS I have signed up for your free Joy-Filled Body Tips.
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Love your site... it's wonderfully creative. It comes alive and makes me want to live a more joy-filled life and the added bonus is that it is also incredibly wise.
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I am a university-bound teenager from the United States. Two years ago I was diagnosed with anorexia, a battle that eventually found me in the hospital.Dieting has robbed me of too much time. I found this website by chance. I've spent a lot of time browsing through articles and reading stories. It has changed my attitude and made me want to be MY ideal weight, not someone else's. Thank you to all the contributors and readers of Mind over Fatter. I deeply appreciate everything you do.(abridged by Cari)
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It's easy in our society today to feel that our value is determined by the number on the scale. I am encouraged to change my mind so I can love myself for who I am not how much I weigh. Thank you so much for your website. It is such an inspiration to me!
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